And the winner is ! Not Ian Richardson.
The amazing Adele
Here at GFD HQ we would wish to add our congratulations to all of the accolades received by the amazing Adele four brits is certainly some achievement but she was not the only winner last night.
Never eat cheese late at night – old wives’ tale – maybe – now I am not so sure.
It had been a particularly heavy day and work was playing on my mind but now it was time to relax, settled down couple of glasses of a nice red and a selection of cheese and crackers bit of cheddar (well maybe more like half a pound) some nice mature Stilton feet up relaxed Brits coming up – let the show begin.
Watched the opening intro’s saw Coldplay kick it off and then – we have all had that moment when we just get too relaxed the eyelids grow heavy and we slowly drift away – I would not say that I missed the Brits I just sort of played out a different version in my slumber.
I was there in the hall ushered to my seat up front near the stage – strange I thought – I’m in the VIP area but as I looked right and then left – where were all the popstars not one was in sight but there were quite a few faces I recognised from the door and glazing industry.
Raised my eyes to the stage expecting to see flashing lights announcing the Brits – instead there were flashing lights announcing the DWARF Awards – ooops my mind said that’s a bit insulting then I read the smaller less bright lights beneath –
Door, Window and related Fenestration Awards
It’s only a little thing but in instances like this the little things matter and this was one where clarification definitely mattered. Hang on – what happened to Coldplay I thought as Ant and Dec walked on to the stage – my mind was telling me there was something very wrong with this scenario but I felt compelled to watch.
As I listened bemused sitting alone at my table for one – Ant went into a welcome speech and Dec announced the first category of winners would all be related to the DOOR industry. I looked around as the room even more bemused where was I and what had happened to the Brits.
Ant again – “and our guest presenter for this sequence of the show Mr Patrick Duffy – better known to most of us as Bobby Ewing from the sit com Dallas – the man who lived the dream”. I should have twigged but I didn’t>
“Over to you Patrick”
For those who have forgotten him this is Patrick Duffy
“our first category this evening – best online composite door sales company – and we have a tie
Timber Composite Doors, and Global Door but as they are both part of the GFD Group there is only one winner – the room around me broke out into tumultuous applause –
Patrick looked at me and announced “we only have one company representative here” I looked around for support as I was beckoned to the stage – a quick handshake a certificate and trophy and relieved back in my seat.
“second category best composite door” a hushed silence fell “again we have a tie
Solidor but only when supplied by Timber Composite Door and Doorstop Intl but only when supplied by Global Door again both GFD Group companies” – bizarre – more applause another trip to the stage and another certificate and trophy.
And so it went on
“Best Timber Composite Door Solidor but only when supplied by Timber Composite Door”
“Best Foam conventional polyurethane foam core Composite Door – Doorstop Intl but only when supplied by Global Door”
“Best Door comparison web site – Composite Door Prices “you guessed it said Patrick another GFD Group company”
“Best Affordable Home Security Solution Provider – the new kid on the block Eurosecure you guessed it said Patrick another GFD Group company”
“Best Home Improvements Group – it’s those guys at Eurosecure again”
This was starting to get ever so slightly tedious and not a little – in fact a lot of if not very embarrassing.
At last the magic words – “and finally the last winner in this category -Best on line trade webs site selling all of the above and the prize goes to “The Trade Village” and it will come as no surprise to here that again it is a GFD Group Company” by now the applause was distinctly mooted –
Queue Ant and Dec again “ Thanks Patrick – Ladies and Gentlemen because of the unbelievable success of the GFD Group who have swept the board in all categories we are this year presenting an Exceptional Achievement Award which will be presented in a couple of minutes when our special celebrity presenter comes into range – but first can we ask Ian Richardson to come on stage – if he can get out from behind the Certificates and trophies and please tell us how the GFD Group has achieved this unbelievable success”
My moment in the spotlight –
“Great products and great service are the key to our success we offer excellent 0% finance we are a British company and selling British manufactured products”
British, British, Brits – something was stirring in my memory banks
“Sorry got to cut you short” said Dec our star presenter is here on line over to our very own astronaut Tim Peake to present the Exceptional Achievement Award to GFD Group” all eyes turn to the big screen – I wait open mouthed – he starts to speak – and then –
Ouch! I reach for my shins which have just been kicked “thought you wanted to watch this” says a familiar voice coming through me hazy slumber “and you’ve snored all te way through it and now you are going to miss Tim Peake”
My eyes still drowsy slowly try to open I wait for the applause to which I have become accustomed I wait for his words and praise – but this cannot be right –
“Adele – Global award” – Global is part of GFD it should be me
Another kick on the shin “shut up I am trying to listen” and at that moment I knew it was over – just like good old Patrick Duffy it had all been a dream or maybe not so much a dream as a premonition of what is yet to come.
And your make believe winners are –
And the Exceptional Achievement Award goes to –